SMILE - November 3, 2018
November 3, 2018
SMILE
“Get your eyes on the good that is coming. Do not dwell on what evil might do to get revenge or try to turn the tide their way again. It will not work! What I have determined for your Nation is what is going to happen. Be assured of that and do not doubt because doubt allows fear and anxiety to enter and steal the power of your faith and joy. Rejoice, and again I say rejoice because My promises to you and to your Nation are great and sure and true. Rest in that and smile and be glad in heart. I have come with the host of Heaven to save, to deliver, to heal and to restore. Smile, good days are your future.”
Diana Larkin | A Watchman’s Journal
Thank you Holy Father, we are so thankful.
ReplyDeleteABBA, THANK YOU that Your promises to us and to our Nation are GREAT and SURE and TRUE.
ReplyDeleteWe are smiling with gladness in heart and resting in Your faithfulness. We love You!
Amen.
THE GREAT AUTUMN DEER COMMITTEE AND THE PUMPKIN CAPER
ReplyDeleteThe day began innocently enough — a beautiful autumn morning. I discovered a doe peacefully reclining beneath my tree, stretched out on a luxurious bed of fallen autumn leaves. She looked positively regal, as though she had booked the presidential suite at the Autumn Leaf Resort. She was chewing away, completely relaxed, with not a care in the world. Deer take their chewing very seriously. They don't just nibble and swallow like the rest of us. They chew at least 50 times, pause for reflection, and then start all over again. I suspect they are savoring every morsel, contemplating its nutritional value, and perhaps wondering what is on the dessert menu.
My two dogs, however, were not impressed with this unexpected guest. They had important business to attend to, and they were not about to let a freeloading doe occupy their yard without proper authorization.
There was a territorial issue. The dogs made their position quite clear, and I was left to negotiate a peaceful resolution.
Out came the garden hose!
A little water diplomacy was all it took. The doe rose from her luxurious leaf bed, gave me a rather offended look, and crossed the street. Before departing, she turned around and took one final look at her cozy accommodations.
I could almost hear her thinking, "Well, this is outrageous! I've been evicted from my Bed-and-Breakfast — without finishing breakfast!"
But, the real entertainment is happening throughout the neighborhood.
The deer are arriving in droves, gleaning with the efficiency of a well-organized agricultural workforce.
There was at least a dozen gathered near my mailbox, along with one particularly impressive buck. He was obviously the Chairman.
They all watched me with great intensity as I approached the mailbox. Not one eye wandered.
I began to wonder what they expected to find in that mailbox.
Perhaps a special delivery from the Pumpkin Growers Association?
Maybe a catalog of this year's finest pumpkins?
Perhaps a shipment of whipping cream?
Or perhaps they were simply waiting for the neighborhood newsletter announcing the official opening of pumpkin season.
They know autumn brings pumpkins, and they are not about to miss their favorite annual delicacy. Timing is everything. They know if they wait too long, those pumpkins may disappear. So, they are keeping a close eye on the neighborhood, holding meetings, assigning surveillance duties, and working out a schedule.
They don't seem to care about the decorative arrangements, the carefully chosen colors, or the fact that someone went to considerable trouble to make the front porch look festive. A pumpkin is a pumpkin, and as far as the deer are concerned, it is simply an invitation to dinner.
The Chairman addresses his fellow deer:
"All right, everyone. We have a limited window of opportunity. The pumpkins are appearing on porches. We must remain alert. Watch the humans. Avoid the dogs. And whatever you do, don't let the garden hose catch you napping!"
Each Fall they have an organized sporting event:
THE ANNUAL DEER PUMPKIN CLASSIC!
The rules are quite simple:
• Locate pumpkins.
• Assemble the team.
• Kick the pumpkins around like soccer balls.
• Continue playing until someone manages to crack one open with a hoof.
• Eat the evidence.
• Repeat until all the pumpkins are gone.
THE OPENING CEREMONY.
The big buck stands proudly at mid-street. The does are lined up along the sidelines, while the younger deer are warming up with a few practice kicks.
"All right, team! No pumpkin left behind! And remember, ladies, this is a contact sport!"
One particularly enthusiastic young buck takes a running start and sends a pumpkin rolling down the sidewalk. Another gives it a mighty kick, sending it spinning into the neighbor's flower bed.
-2-
ReplyDeleteThe deer cheer and stand up on their hind legs!
Then comes the grand finale. Someone finally delivers a hoof-powered blow that cracks the pumpkin wide open.
SPLAT!
Pumpkin pulp everywhere!
Seeds flying!
Orange goo splattering across the grass!
A few deer leap backward in surprise, while the more experienced players rush in for the feast.
"DINNER IS SERVED!"
Of course, there is always one troublemaker who wants to take the game to another level. I suspect he is the same fellow who raids the flower beds, samples the shrubbery, and thinks nothing of leaving those little calling cards on the lawn.
And just when I think I have seen everything, the whole committee is staring at my house.
I am beginning to think they have a master plan.
They have scouts stationed everywhere. One is assigned to watch the porches, another to monitor the mailbox, and a third to keep track of the dogs.
I wouldn't be surprised if they transmit secret frequency messages.
Meanwhile, the dogs are keeping watch, and they’re beginning to feel outnumbered. They have their own agenda, and it does not include sharing the property with an entire deer convention.
I may have to appoint myself Director of Neighborhood Security and make the garden hose my official enforcement equipment.
The deer, however, seem unimpressed by my authority.
They know the range of the garden hose.
They also know the pumpkins are out there, and time is running short. They understand that if they wait too long, the pumpkins will disappear. This is their annual event to enjoy a seasonal feast.
I can almost hear the Chairman saying:
"Listen up, everyone! There are pumpkins remaining on porches. We have a narrow window of opportunity. Avoid the dogs, watch for the garden hose, and whatever you do, don't let the humans catch us eating the decorations!"
One of the younger deer raises a hoof.
"Mr. Chairman, what if we get caught?"
"Then we look innocent, chew our cud, and pretend we were just passing through."
"Sir, what if they ask who broke the pumpkin?"
"TELL THEM YOUR NAME IS “BAMBI” AND THAT YOU’RE INNOCENT!"
And so, autumn continues.
The leaves are falling, the remaining pumpkins are still arranged on porches, the dogs are on patrol, and the deer committee is working overtime.
I actually live in a peaceful neighborhood surrounded by nature.
No one informed me ahead of time that I was moving into the middle of a highly organized deer syndicate with a sports division, a dining department, a surveillance team, and a Chairman who takes his pumpkin procurement responsibilities very seriously.
I am beginning to wonder whether I should put up a sign next fall:
NOTICE TO ALL DEER:
Pumpkins are not community property.
The garden hose is armed and operational.
Violators will be subjected to a surprise shower.
If I should happen to find a pumpkin rolling down the street with a dozen deer chasing after it, I will know the championship game is underway.
I only hope someone remembers to bring the halftime refreshments.
Knowing this crowd, they'll probably eat those, too!
I’m wondering if they’re conjuring a Thanksgiving turkey heist!
* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
p.s. Before nightfall, I found a newsletter on my lawn, “The Daily Deer: All the News That's Fit to Chew!” It was probably left by the doe that didn’t get to finish her breakfast. The deer may run the neighborhood, but I still control the water supply! 😊 tpp
-3-
ReplyDeleteTHE GREAT THANKSGIVING TURKEY HEIST
Just when I thought the neighborhood deer had exhausted their supply of mischief, I noticed something suspicious happening near the mailbox.
There they were again. The entire committee!
The big buck was standing in front, looking unusually serious. The doe were gathered behind him, whispering among themselves, while several younger deer appeared to be pacing nervously.
I knew immediately that something was brewing.
The pumpkin season was winding down, and apparently the committee was already planning its next big adventure: THANKSGIVING!
I could almost hear the chairman addressing his troops.
"All right, everyone. We've had a successful pumpkin season, but it's time to expand our menu. I've received intelligence that the humans are preparing a Thanksgiving feast. There will be turkey, dressing, sweet potatoes, cranberry sauce, and possibly pie. We must act quickly!"
One young doe raises her hoof.
"Sir, what exactly is a turkey?"
The Chairman pauses.
"Excellent question. It's a large bird that apparently has very poor judgment. We believe it is the centerpiece of the feast."
Another deer speaks up.
"Do we eat it raw?"
"Absolutely not! We have standards!"
The Chairman then assigns the duties.
The young bucks would serve as reconnaissance officers.
The doe would investigate the neighborhood kitchens.
One particularly nosy deer would be assigned to mailbox surveillance.
The largest buck would be in charge of transportation, although nobody was quite sure how he intended to transport a turkey.
Then comes the biggest problem.
How were they going to get past the dogs?
The Chairman calls a strategy session.
"We must avoid the barking patrol at all costs. Those two canines have already demonstrated their hostility toward peaceful deer occupation. And whatever you do, stay away from the garden hose!"
A nervous young buck speaks up.
"Sir, what if the homeowner catches us?"
The chairman straightens his neck.
"We deny everything. We were simply passing through on our way to a salad bar."
Meanwhile, I’m beginning to suspect something.
The deer are looking at my house with entirely too much interest. They aren't even pretending to graze anymore. They are staring at the windows.
They must be counting the chairs around the dining room table.
Then, things take a turn.
I step outside and discover the big buck standing near the front porch. Behind him are at least six deer, all lined up like contestants waiting for a cooking show.
The Chairman looks at me.
I look at him.
He looks at the house.
I look at the garden hose.
He takes one step backward.
I take one step forward.
It’s a standoff worthy of the Wild West.
Then I hear a strange noise from across the street.
GOBBLE! GOBBLE! GOBBLE!
Every deer turns toward the sound.
Apparently, someone had brought a turkey into the neighborhood!
The Chairman's eyes widen.
"THE TARGET HAS ARRIVED!"
The deer scatter in every direction.
One runs behind a tree. Another takes off across the lawn. A young buck nearly collides with the mailbox. The Chairman, attempts to maintain order, shouting:
"STAY CALM! THIS IS A CONTROLLED OPERATION!"
-4-
ReplyDeleteThe turkey, meanwhile, is having none of it. He puffs up his feathers, struts across the yard, and lets out a gobble so loud that even the dogs stop barking.
For one solemn moment, the deer committee meets its match.
The turkey advances.
The deer retreat.
The Chairman turns and runs.
What a spectacular collapse of neighborhood leadership.
By the time I recover from laughing, the entire committee disappears.
I suspect another meeting is being scheduled as we speak.
The Chairman will undoubtedly report that the mission was unsuccessful due to an unexpected security breach involving Theodore McFeathers, an aggressive wild turkey.
And I wouldn't be surprised if the next committee newsletter reads:
IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT
The Thanksgiving turkey operation has been postponed indefinitely.
All members are advised to return to pumpkin activities until further notice.
The turkey has been classified as hostile.
And under no circumstances is anyone to approach it.
As for me, I have decided to take precautions.
The pumpkins — all but gone.
The Thanksgiving turkey —under protective custody.
The dogs — on high alert.
The garden hose — fully operational.
I may even put up a new sign.
ATTN: DEER COMMITTEE CHAIRMAN:
Pumpkin season is over.
Turkey season is NOT OPEN.
Violators will be chased, barked at, or thoroughly watered.
HAPPY THANKSGIVING, YOU UNAUTHORIZED WOODLAND VISITORS!
* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
p.s. The turkey and the big buck will probably become lifelong enemies. And that why Theodore McFeathers is now the neighborhood's New Sheriff. He’s already asking for his badge, a sheriff's hat, and a deputy.
😊 tpp
Ha! Thank you, TPP, for sharing your precious of story telling with us! Your stories are absolutely wonderful and healing, in so many ways! They bring so much Joy to the heart! ❤️
DeleteYou are such a blessing to us all!
Prescious gift!
DeletePrecious and delightful!! Exactly what I needed! Thank you TPP! (Printed and put in my TPP story folder).
DeleteSmiling 😊
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